Thursday, March 31, 2011

Bunsen Clams

Today is Bunsen Burner Day! The inventor of the bunsen burner, Robert Wilhelm Eberhard von Bunsen, was born on March 31st, 1811. The bunsen burner is an important part of scientific experiments. At least it was on the high school level, but I assume real scientists use it constantly as well because that's what I see in the movies. I don't know of any way to celebrate this holiday other than playing experimenting with a bunsen burner. I suppose you could also simply spread the word about Robert. His name is a mouthful, though.

Today is also Clams On The Half Shell Day! Today, go out to a seafood type restaurant and order clams on the half shell. Or just go get some clams yourself and eat them. It's a raw dish. See what makes seafood so disgusting? I mean fruits and vegetables are also technically raw when I eat them, but they also were never sentient beings. Don't get me wrong: I eat cow/chicken/pig and all that good stuff. But aquatic things just... they don't change looks from the habitat to my plate. It freaks me out!

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Taking Control

Today is I Am In Control Day! It is a day to gain some control back in your life that you may have lost over time. It's easy to feel like you've lost control, especially when things seem to be moving to fast for us to keep up with. Actually... come to think of it, I think we may only say something is "out of control" when we can't or won't own up to our own responsibility in the situation. I've NEVER heard someone say "This is out of control because of me". I most definitely HAVE heard people say "I've got this under control". That's most likely because once something becomes chaotic, we don't want any of the blame for it nor the responsibility for bringing it back to a state of calm. We will, however, take all the credit for something done right without a second thought.

That was a bit of a tangent. Today is a day to get your junk together and start being in control. It's like the scene in an action movie with thousands of bad guys charging towards the hero/heroine, who is frightened by the insurmountable army of zombies/nazis/monsters/aliens. The love interest will say something that causes the hero/heroine to have a flashback to something that a family member/friend once told him/her. When the flashback is over, the hero/heroine will say something witty to the love interest making her/him swoon/say something funny. The hero/heroine then stands up, draws his/her sword/gun and gets back on his/her horse/car/bike/spaceship and charges towards a slow-mo/slideshow fight to the tune of loud techno/operatic orchestra/We Aren't Gonna Take It by Twisted Sister. Roll Credits.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Magic Tricks and Politics

Today is the Festival of Smoke and Mirrors Day! This sounds like the kind of festival someone could lose a lot of money very fast in. Today is a day to celebrate, create, and partake in illusions. You can either go the classic route of magic tricks and sleight of hand, or you can take the phrase in it's more modern meaning of constantly hiding or distorting the truth. I recommend you take the first option, as almost everybody will enjoy a magic trick. On the other end of the spectrum, almost nobody likes a liar. It is all up to you, of course.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Monday, March 28, 2011

New Diet Craze

Today is Something on a Stick Day! Today is a celebration of a fairly specific type of food that has a surprising amount of variants and possibilities. From corn dogs to popsicles, today is a day to eat anything and everything that comes on a stick. Roasted marshmallows, lollipops, cotton candy, shish kabobs, and even free samples at the mall can be eating today. There is, of course, a more interesting and slightly messier way to celebrate if you are so inclined. Try taking foods that are not usually seen on a stick or even eaten with silverware and put them on a stick. Some difficult ones would be pizza, hard tacos, or soup. Find a bunch of skewers or sticks and carry them with you today in case you come across food that is not already on a stick. Now that I think about it, it might even make a decent diet. The "Something on a Stick Diet™" by Kyle: Never eat any more than what fits on an average-length food skewer. Of course, then you run into problems like the fact that you could technically fit 3-4 deep dish pizzas on one skewer if you really wanted to. Well, the idea was fun while it lasted.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Joe Schmoe

Today is National "Joe" Day! At first I thought that this would be a holiday celebrating coffee, which slightly excited me because I drink coffee rarely enough to make it somewhat of a treat. However, I could not have been further off. Well, I could have been, but let's save philosophical talks for later on in this blog. Today is a day to go around and either call everyone "Joe", ask to be called "Joe", or both. Why? I have absolutely no idea. Maybe because Joe is a popular name in America even in nicknames. Joe the Plumber is the first that comes to my mind. Which is odd because I'm not that into politics (which is another talk for another day). Off topic. Today go around calling everyone you see "Joe" and ask to be called "Joe". If you know someone who is actually named "Joe", be sure to let them know how special they are today. Or at least their name.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Funnel Spinach?

Today is Spinach Festival Day! Today is a day to pay some tribute to spinach by eating it or cooking it or at least watching Popeye the Sailor cartoons. I just got back from Six Flags and the combination of the hot, hot sun plus walking around for hours has left my stomach in quite a moody state, so I think I'll stick to watching Popeye. I also just don't have any spinach, and frankly am not well versed at all in what to make with it. Aside from Spinach Salad. Recipe: Spinach + Plate + Dressing?* (*may not be necessary)

Today is also Make Up Your Own Holiday Day! I assume that every year I can make a new one, and that my decision for today will not make every subsequent M.U.Y.O.H.D. the same celebration. In light of that made up knowledge, I choose to dub today "Funnel Cake Day". Funnel Cake is delicious. Even when it is as overpriced as it was at Six Flags, there is just no getting around the fact that it is an absolutely mouth watering treat. I mean look at this:
How could you not want to eat that?

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Friday, March 25, 2011

To eat or not to eat

Today is Pecan Day! Today is a day to celebrate the pecan. I have to admit: I rarely ever eat pecans, and when I do, it has never been too delicious. I've just never been a pecan type of guy. Nutty right? (Ha) Well,  there is one kind of pecan that I'm okay with eating a few of, and that would be roasted pecans. When roasted in the right kind of flavor, I may even go so far as to eat 4 or 5 pecans!

Today is also International Waffle Day! A day to celebrate waffles is by far more understandable to me. There are so many ways to make waffles, and even top them after they are baked. Some people don't like waffles and prefer pancakes. In my humble opinion, it's all about the mood you're in. Sure, pancakes absorb a little more, but waffles just seem to have more flavor packed into them. Not to mention waffles don't flop around on your fork when you try to eat them. Speaking of flopping around, you could also spend today celebrating the first definition of waffle: Fail to make up one's mind. I've already started celebrating that way. I can't decide whether or not to celebrate these two holidays together. The waffle would make the pecan taste better, but the pecan would make the waffle taste worse. A predicament for the ages. Or at least today.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Melts in your mouth. And your hands.

Today is National Chocolate Covered Raisins Day! If you are anything like me, you know the value of a good chocolate covered raisin. They are quite possibly one of the best candy treats in existence. I'm not really a fan of chocolate and fruit mixed together aside from strawberries, bananas, and raisins. I don't understand the people who can eat chocolate "infused" with orange or raspberry. That's off topic, though. Chocolate covered raisins are delicious and precious. I say precious because they melt FAST if you aren't careful in the summer, and sometimes they come pre-melted n the store. It can be hard during these coming months to enjoy them as you so easily can in the fall, winter, or early spring. So perhaps today is a day to go out and celebrate them before it is too late. A word of advice from a self-proclaimed chocolate covered raisin professional: Stick to Raisinets. There may be a better brand, but I haven't found it yet.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Organized by flavor.

Today is National Organize Your Home Office Day! This is another one of those fancy self-explanatory holidays. It does however, have a few loopholes. In fact, I own one of those loopholes. I have no home office to clean. What I DO have, however, is a laptop and a desktop PC that could both use a little re-organization of some stray files. It's not as bad on a Mac, because it seems to know where files are much faster when I ask the Spotlight in the upper part of the screen. When I ask my PC where a file is, it not only doesn't remember, it chooses to look in all the least likely places for it to be before it finds it. Don't be fooled! I'm neither a Mac or PC. It's just that in that one area, Macs are most definitely better. Don't feel bad, PC's, you still have a lot more video games.

Today is also National Chip and Dip Day! This day leaves a lot to the imagination. What kind of chip do I eat? Potato? Tortilla? ... Corn Tortilla? I might even be inclined to eat french fries just because they are called chips sometimes. Which, by the way, opens a whole new floodgate of dips to choose from. Maybe you don't know what kind of chip goes best with what dip. Here are some of my favourite combos to help get you started.

Potato + Sour Cream & Onion
Potato + French Onion
Tortilla + Salsa
Tortilla + Queso
Apple Chips + Nothing. Apple chips are delicious. Dip them straight into your mouth.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Ya Done Goofed

Today is National Goof-off Day! I at first thought that today would be celebrated by fun, pointless games and having a questionable sanity in public, but as it turns out, the dictionary says that a goof-off is a lazy person who does less than their fair share of work. I find this odd because when I'm lazy, I'm called lazy. I've only been called a goof-off when I joke around in a goofy way. So I'm saying that this holiday is open to debate on how to celebrate it. To be safe, I've decided to keep it simple and be slightly lazy while still having fun. I choose to watch both Goofy Movies. That should satisfy my need for seeing funny hijinks and antics happen, along with satisfying the dictionary's need for laziness (as I will be on a couch or in bed for at least an extra 4 hours).

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Monday, March 21, 2011

A nose by any other name...

... would still smell.

Today is Fragrance Day! It's fairly obviously dedicated to the more fragrant things such as flowers, fresh baked sweets, and perfume. Ladies will probably be better at this holiday, so to them I say: Select your favourite perfume/soap/shampoo/over-all scent and wear it proudly today. This next talk is between me and my fellow man, so if you are a lady, feel free to stop reading here.

Okay, guys, I don't know what it is about us, but let's face it: We stink sometimes often a lot of the time and simply don't realize it. Today is a day to not do that. Take a shower, shampoo your hair and repeat the lather like it says to on the bottle. You might even go crazy and condition. It never hurt anybody. Now see that oddly shaped, smooth rock on the side of the wall? Yeah, the one with the carving in it? Yeah that's actually soap and not a decorative statue. You're gonna take that and and put it everywhere on you. Now when you're done with the shower, dry off and put some deodorant on. WHOA STOP RIGHT THERE! I know you started reaching for that body spray. No, use REAL deodorant. The kind that stops smells instead of hoping that a cloud of AXE Phoenix will just cover up anything that happens to your shirt today. I'm talking to you, 8th graders. Feel free to spray a little on, but don't overpower anybody. It helps to not use AXE, too. I'm beginning to think that AXE might mean "Ouch! My nose. Where is the gas leak?" In some ancient language. Their stick deodorant is fine though.

Well, that's about all I can do for ya. Oh don't forget to put clean clothes on. I almost wasn't going to mention clothes since today is Fragrance Day and not Fashionista Day. However, it just occurred to me how comfortable we are with wearing the same clothes for several days. Do not do that. Wear something clean. If you don't have anything clean, then go buy new clothes. And find a local laundromat. Soon. Buy some minty gum, too. Because as it turns out, girls don't like breakfast burrito breath. Who would have thought, right?

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

P.S. Mango is possibly one of the best smells in my opinion.

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Down on one tentacle

Today is Proposal Day! It is a day to propose. Plain and simple. Maybe your boyfriend of 17 years has been dragging his feet slightly, you could drop a hint or two today. If you are a male and are planning to propose to the point that you have the ring with you at all times and you are just waiting for the perfect moment, then look VERY hard for an opportunity today in the spirit of the holiday. And I mean come on, what are you waiting for an engraved invitation? How many hints must she drop?

It could also just be a day to propose ideas or activities. It's literally as easy as putting the word 'propose' into the sentence. EX: [Before] "Let's go to a tour of a Wisconsin cheese factory" [After] "I propose we take a tour of a Wisconsin cheese factory". One of my favourite kinds of these proposals was the much prolonged (on purpose in a sense) proposal on The Office.

Today is also The Festival of Extraterrestrial Abductions! I know. Kind of a mood-wrecker. These holidays really don't mesh and it's going to kill me when I try to come up with a semi-witty title for this post that deals with both. Anyways, this is or was a festival where people would gather and celebrate(?) the fact that they had either been abducted or really wanted to be abducted. They make tin foil hats and statues and sell all sorts of things that I'm sure you could also find at places like A'Le'Inn. You can celebrate by wondering if the "Supermoon" was actually an alien mother-ship that may have abducted the people who will think they "missed out on seeing it."

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Saturday, March 19, 2011

A Fowl Day

Today is Poultry Day! It is a day to celebrate everything poultry. By celebrate, I of course mean: eat. I say that because when you say the word "poultry", there are two things people might think. The first being "Like Shakespearean stuff?", and the second (more accurate) one being "Like from a butcher shop?". That's because live birds are rarely called poultry until they are dead and hanging in the market. So poultry, being dead, has really next to no use as good and tasty as being eaten by us. So cook up anything from chicken to emu and eat it up.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Friday, March 18, 2011

Thank You

Today is Supreme Sacrifice Day. This is quite possibly the most serious holiday yet, as it is meant to raise awareness of the people who have given themselves up for the sake of another. It can be a day to remember those who have given quite literally everything they had in order to help others, or a day to celebrate those who risk doing so on an almost daily basis. I know that I am infinitely thankful for Jesus laying down his life in order to save everyone in the world from a horrible fate. I'm thankful for soldiers both past and present who have fought to preserve the nation that I live in. I'm also thankful for the force of men and women that I refer to as the Red, White, and Blue (Firefighters, Doctors, and Police Officers). I can't imagine that I originally thought that the colours of their uniform correlated so well with the meanings of the colours of the flag. In fact, it fits to well to have not been planned out by someone. 

Firefighters work uniforms may be more of a yellow and orange, but let's face it: they are known for the colour red. Red on the flag is said to represent valor and hardiness. Valor is defined by great courage in the face of danger, and Hardiness means having the capability of enduring difficult conditions. Those two words fit my mind's eye's view of firefighters perfectly. Those two traits would be absolutely necessary when going into a burning building.

Doctors, once again, wear scrubs or something close to them, but they are known for the long white coat. White on the flag means 'purity' or 'innocence'. This fits them as well, as the last thing I think of when I think of a doctor is 'dirty'. Even the places they work always look so clean. Not to mention that their entire job is to help others keep their bodies pure. You may be saying "But what do doctors sacrifice?" Well, they sacrifice a LOT of time and money on constantly learning the new medical techniques, so they can become very easily stressed and may miss very important social occasions in order to make sure they are always prepared to help the people who need them. Not to mention all the disgusting things they must have to see in a lifetime.

Police are blue through and through. Their uniforms, their cars, even some of their buildings. The flag's blue stands for vigilance, perseverance, and justice. Those words are so definitive of cops, I guarantee you that you can't watch a cop movie without hearing one of them said by the chief. Policemen and policewomen are always on task and ready to help preserve the peace. Even when they are off duty, they are on duty. I've made friends with a few officers of the law (literally not sarcastically), and in all my experiences with them, they have proven to be very fair purveyors of the law.

So thank you to anyone and everyone who has ever sacrifice anything for the sake of another. You are awesome and deserve to be recognized far more often than you are.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Yellow Submarine

Today is Submarine Day! Today can be celebrated one of two ways according to my research. It can be celebrated as a day for actual submarines, or it can be celebrated as a submarine sandwich day. There are obviously very subtle differences between how you might celebrate the existence of either thing, so I've made a helpful little comparison guide to help you out.

Submarine (ship): Go into the belly of the ship (or bowels depending on how dramatic you are/how far down you go)

Submarine (sandwich): Put one in your belly (Eventually bowels. Not an option.)

Submarine (ship): Try to make a submersible item of your own while still keeping air inside of it. It doesn't have to actual size. Maybe a water bottle in a bath tub.

Submarine (sandwich): Don't do that with a sandwich. Bread floats and tastes nasty after being in a bath tub. Possibly find something to dip your sandwich in like ranch or that french dip at Arby's.

Submarine (ship): Find out how much of a submarine you could buy. An attack one is roughly $13,951,671 per square foot. Thats an insanely rough estimate, though. Only top-result google research was involved. Still. Dang.

Submarine (sandwich): 5 Dollar Footlong.

So that's about all the ways I can think of to celebrate today that I can make into some kind of humorous joke while maintaining some semblance of slight realism. So I'm gonna go clean a garage I think and then head over to a sub-shop for lunch. I don't think there's an actual submarine anywhere near me. But, if there is. I will take a picture.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Dudley

Today is Everything You Do is Right Day! It is pretty much the counterpart to yesterday, in the sense that it celebrates the days where everything just seems to go right. Spend today trying to do things that you may have been putting off, because if you are celebrating today correctly, then you will have no problem doing the harder tasks. There isn't really much else to say about today, so get out there and do right!

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Being Wrong and Buzzards

Today is Buzzard's Day! This holiday is pretty much exclusive to Ohio, as citizens spend today celebrating the return of the buzzards. Buzzards are apparently also known as turkey vultures, which makes me wonder: Why? Both turkeys and vultures aren't really animals I ever thought about outright celebrating the return of. Aside from thanksgiving or the time I have to decide between a Santa Fe Chicken Wrap or a Turkey Club Sandwich, I rarely think about turkey at all. As for vultures, I've only ever actually seen them in cartoon deserts or The Jungle Book. I thought that maybe it was Ohio's state bird, but I was wrong. Their state bird is the cardinal. I don't understand this holiday, but I suppose if I see a buzzard, I'll give it a smile.

Today is also Everything You Think is Wrong Day! This may seem like a somewhat cruel holiday, and it kind of is. Today is a day spent in the awareness of the fact that some days just do not go right. Well, to be more exact, it's for those days when everything goes wrong. No matter what you think might fix a situation, something will come along and make it worse. We all have had those days, and we all will simply give in to them eventually and watch our day fall apart around us. Don't worry, though. After days like those, the next day always seems so much better.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Monday, March 14, 2011

Delicious Math

Today is National Potato Chip Day! Potato chips are one of the most popular snacks in america, and they come in a large variety of flavours. I don't know what it is about potatoes, but almost anything that is made with them in the recipe is pure culinary gold. Well, today you should obviously celebrate potato chips by eating your favourite kind, and maybe buy a few of those weird sounding flavours that you haven't tried before. Have a discussion with your fellow food loving friends about all things potato chips to find out their favourite flavour. If potato chips aren't necessarily your thing then don't worry, because...

Today is also National Pi Day! Yes, that's right. Today being March 14th, or 3/14, makes it the perfect day to celebrate the mathematical Pi. In case you haven't noticed yet or you just don't know why that matters, it's because 3, 1, and 4 are the most recognized numbers of Pi (3.14). Now, I'm imagining a 50's jock reading this and saying in a Moose-esque voice "I ain't gonna cel'brate a NERD hol'day!" Well, that's all well and good if you don't want to, but the celebration entails eating pie. So think on that before you let this holiday slide on by. You don't need to recite the entire sequence of Pi. Although... you could try I suppose?



3.1415926535897932384626433832795028841971693993751058209749445923078164062862089986280348253421170679821480865132823066470938446095505822317253594081284811174502841027019385211055596446229489549303819644288109756659334461284756482337867831652712019091456485669234603486104543266482133936072602491412737245870066063155881748815209209628292540917153643678925903...

...

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Bling Bling

Today is Jewel Day! It is a fairly straightforward day, as it is celebrated by giving or receiving jewelry. I don't have very many anecdotes about today, as I have rarely given or received jewelry. I will say that this is by no means meant to be an expensive holiday. Any piece of jewelry will do, but don't let me stop you from going all out. You can give anything from the cheapest bracelet you can find to the most expensive ring. Maybe even a very special ring? ... Probably not, though. When asked why you chose to propose on a particular day, saying "Some kid's blog said it was a good day for it." is not exactly the best of answers. If you're in a street gang, maybe you could get one of your fellow hoodlums some more "ice". If that's what they call it still. I guess you already knew how "street" I was by the time I said "hoodlums", though.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Vertigo

Today is Alfred Hitchcock Day! I have absolutely no idea why the holiday committee chose today, because I can't find anything about him that happened today. However, that is not very important, as a lot of other holidays have been much, much more obscure.

Alfred Hitchcock, as I hope you all know, was and is known as a aster of psychological suspense. His movies may not have been the kind that you openly screamed at, but they definitely affected how much sleep you got that night. He is also well known for appearing in his own films in one way or another through small cameos. He was able to make the audience feel like part of the movie with camera work that was meant to look like it was the view of an actual person through techniques like view-bobbing or quick-panning.

Today is a day to remember all the classic thrillers he created. The easiest and most convenient way would to be to go down to your local video rental store and rent one or two of his movies and watch them. If his work is just a little too "scary" or "creepy" for you, you might consider renting a comedic tribute to Hitchcock called "High Anxiety". In fact, Hitchcock himself liked it enough to send the producer a bottle of wine. Or so wikipedia says.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Friday, March 11, 2011

Apples, Tools, and Cake

Today is Johnny Appleseed Day! Even though he died today, he is celebrated in March because it is planting season. Obviously it would be a little hard to go out and celebrate by planting your own apple trees, selling them to people, preaching sermons, and donation the little money you make to poor all while slowly but surely becoming an American legend. So instead, just try to put a lot of apples into your diet today. Out of all the things that I've asked you to participate in eating all day, this is by far the healthiest! So take advantage of it! Besides, apples are the most versatile of fruits, in my humble opinion. Just think about how many things they have going for them. Really think about it.

Today is also Worship of Tools Day! Why the word 'worship' was chosen, I do not know. It's not a holiday for some weird obscure religion that literal worships garage-dwelling apparatus. No, it's just a day to give tools to people who appreciate them, or maybe just appreciate them yourselves. Most websites claim this to be a "man day" although they usually also said you shouldn't ignore the females who also work with tools. I'm frankly just thankful that the day is talking about the kind of 'tool' that it is.

Today is also my birthday. To celebrate, ask other people "Did you know it's Kyle's birthday today?" and when they ask "Who is Kyle?", then you just point them on over to this blog. That's all I want from you, internet. It's a little greedy, so if you don't like that idea, then get yourself something nice and tell me what you got yourself. If it helps, ask other people to chip in for a gift for me, and then use that money on something for yourself. After all, that's technically kinda what I just asked for as a gift. I accept no responsibility for loud arguments you may or may not have with your close ones after you have done that, though.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Flowers in the sidewalk

Today is Festival of Life in the Cracks Day! This holiday was quite difficult to find any solid information on, but I think I now have a good idea of what it means. I'm fairly sure that anyone who has ever walked on a sidewalk has seen a crack from which a plant is growing or thousands of ants are traveling in and out of. Those would be examples of life in a crack. Now, I know that most of the things that live in those places are not usually on the top of our celebrating list. After all,  cracks, crevasses, and holes are where the creepy crawlers live. No person in their right mind would put their hand under a shady rock in the desert, and they definitely wouldn't celebrate the scorpion that they find. But, today is their day of celebration. That doesn't mean you have to go out of your way to have a one-on-one talk with that spider under your fridge that seems to just be sitting and waiting for its perfect chance to bite your toes, though.

I like to think of it as more of a celebration of the fact that life even can exist in such a place. They're small, dark, and cramped enough that I hardly even notice them most of the time. When I do think about it, though, it's pretty cool that a flower can find it's way through the tiniest little hole in the concrete. If anything, it stands out more than a flower in a field of flowers like it. I know that the flower in the cement is hardy simply because of where it has grown out of. Not to mention the bright color of it's petals in front of grey cement just makes it more noticeable.

So, if you really wanted to, you could make this a day to remember that a life in the cracks, although it can feel small, dark, and cramped, can be very rewarding after you get through that space. Much like the flower in the cement, it's easy to tell which people in life have been through some difficult situations or cracks in their life and come out better for it. Take today to also celebrate that they, like the flowers, are examples that it can be done.
Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Free pass for a meltdown.

Today is Panic Day! Today you get a free pass to be as run-around-in-circles worried as you need to be. Visiting my old high school, I can tell you that panic is in the air. It may be hard to see, but whether it be juniors stressing over an 'extremely hard' paper, or teachers trying to deal with the stresses that the spring season brings at a k-12 school: Panic is in the air.

Having recently been a substitute to a 1st grade class on a Friday, I can say with certainty that teachers have every right to panic every day they go to work. It is an act of courtesy and dignity that they choose to maintain their composure. Today, however, feel free to let your teacher know that it's okay to freak out. You won't tell their boss that they flipped a chair, or yelled at a student, or even that they plan on spending their free period curled up in the corner rocking their crazy away.

Students, you can take advantage of the Internet knowledge your generation has been gifted, and instead use facebook to let everyone you know (and around 570 people you don't know) just how many reasons you have to panic.

After all the extra panicking you do today, tomorrow should be panic free! Right? ... RIGHT?!

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Becoming Oscar.

Today is Be Nasty Day. Today is a day to be... well... nasty. The word 'nasty' can mean many different things, though. the first thing I thought was to be mean to everyone, and I'm sure that's what most of you thought, too. However, the first definition of 'nasty' in my handy dandy macbook dictionary is "Highly unpleasant, especially to the senses; physically nauseating". Now, I don't know about you, but there are very few people I have seen in my life that have physically nauseated me. I've met people that I thought were disgusting in a few ways, sure, but to actually be at the point of debating whether or not I could hold in an urge to throw up while in their presence? That's a rarity.

Of course, the dictionary also defines it in the way we would think normally. "Behaving in an unpleasant or spiteful way". Ah, there we go. We have all been around someone being this kind of nasty, and we have all been this kind of nasty. This kind of nasty is easier to pull off as well, because there are many different actions that various people will view as nasty.

Not I recommend going all-out in your celebration of this Holiday, but if one were to choose to do so, I would recommend following the second definition. It's not only easier, it's most likely healthier in the short-run. If this holiday were year-long, I'd recommend the second. I've contractually obligated myself to celebrate each holiday "To the best that my current circumstances allow", however. So I will be doing my best to be nasty all day. Luckily, I have the internet, which makes it just oh-so-much easier to be nasty towards others. As for being disgusting... uh... I just... won't... shower? ... It's just a day after all.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

P.S. I do not approve of internet bullying.

Monday, March 7, 2011

Bacon King

Today is National Crown Roast of Pork Day.  It is fairly obviously a day to roast and eat pork. I don't know if it HAS to be a crown roast of pork specifically, and I'm going to have to hope not for my sake. As a 20 year old college boy, I do not have the supplies to make a crown roast of pork, and even more importantly: I don't have the money to buy those supplies. What I can do is make up for that fact. I have enough pork related products in the house to trick my stomach into eating multiple crown roasts. If you are fortunate enough to be able to celebrate this holiday properly, however, please share with friends. If everyone bought and ate their own, that would only further certain thoughts about the american lifestyle.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Pull back corner of film to vent.

Today is National Frozen Food Day! It is indeed a grand day for bachelors everywhere, as this makes up quite a bit of our diet. Well, thats a bit of a half-true blanket statement. I can cook, but that talent seems to only be truly any good in the area of desserts. Although I can make a mean wrap. The point being, that frozen foods are easy, fast, and delicious if you know what kinds to get. Hot Pockets? Yummy. Do I regret eating them almost immediately after I do? You bet. Some frozen foods are delicious AND good for you, though. Healthy Choice would be the obvious example there.

Let us not forget however, that 'frozen food' does not always mean 'meal-in-a-box'. No, food is food; so logically frozen food is any edible good that is frozen to preserve its flavour. Fruit, meat, veggies, ice cream, sherbet, sometimes pop-tarts, and even those certain candies that are just better frozen (I'm looking at you, charleston chew). Yes, frozen food certainly does encompass a lot of foods we partake in.

We have two people to thank for this holiday. First and foremost is Clarence Birdseye, whose name probably foretold of his awesometude later in life. He invented the process of freezing foods. Clarence, this Hot Pocket Sloppy Joe Side Shot goes out to you, my fellow man. The next shout out is for the man who saw the greatness of frozen food, and wisely used his position of power to give it the honor it deserved: Ronald Reagan. Yes, indeed, we can rest assured that he was also a fan of the quick-meal. He made this national holiday on March 6, 1984 saying "Now, Therefore, I, Ronald Reagan, President of the United States of America, do hereby proclaim March 6, 1984, as Frozen Food Day, and I call upon the American people to observe such day with appropriate ceremonies and activities." Awesome. Just awesome.


Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Saturday, March 5, 2011

An Inner Round Table.

Today is Multiple Personality Day. Almost every site I went to while researching this day said: "It's an opportunity to get in touch with yourselves." They used that exact phrasing, so I'm assuming I would be wrong to not use it as well. I don't believe I know anybody with multiple personalities, but then again, it says "get in touch with yourself", not "with others' other personalities". So I suppose today can be seen as a way to get in touch with a side of yourself that you might not be all too connected to.

Some examples might be reconnecting with your inner child, getting in touch with your feminine side, or talking to your anger to find out why he is so angry. It can also be a day to just purposefully change personality types throughout the day (It's not the same as just being moody). Mostly though, it seems to be a day of introspection. A day to step back into your own mind and find out what is really going on behind the scenes of your everyday thoughts. Seems like fun!

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Friday, March 4, 2011

Holy Experiments, Batman

Today is Holy Experiment Day! I've researched this holiday as best as I could, and it seems it is a day to literally test out holy things to see whether or not God exists, or is who He says He is. As a christian, I see both good and bad sides to this holiday. Let's start with the good. This is a good day for someone who isn't religious to 'test the waters' without any real pressure from other influences, as they can simply claim to be observing a one day holiday. If something does happen due to what they do today, though, be it an answered prayer, or seeing God move in their life, then it may help introduce them to God and how he works.

HOWEVER, the bad side severely outweighs the good. The holiday insinuates in it's own way that religion is can be experimented in as if it were a science. Scientific experiments, if done again and again, always have the same outcome. Religion simply doesn't work that way. Prayers are not always answered in the way you may want them to be, and there isn't any kind of specific date you get on when it will be answered or how it will be answered. This holiday seems to make God out to be like some kind of vending machine that you can try out today, and if it doesn't work for you, then you can move on. Which is not the way ANY religion should be looked at.

I'll readily admit to not being the strongest christian in the world, as I do have a lot of work to do. A LOT of work. Sure, today can be used to try something new religiously. Maybe if you haven't fasted before (which by the way isn't always abstaining from food), then that could be something you try, or maybe try going out of your comfort zone to 1) Talk to a pastor about religion, or 2) Talk about your religion to people who may not know about your religion.

If any one has feedback, especially for this holiday, please comment below. It is early, so I may not have been able to be as clear as I want to be on this subject.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Happy girls sing.

Today is I Want You To Be Happy Day! It is a day to wish happiness on your friends without looking for ways in which it might somehow benefit you in return. Make today all about others, and less about you. In fact, do a little more thank simply telling them you want them to be happy, and actually do something that will make them happy. It doesn't have to take a grand, planned effort. Just something small yet meaningful to brighten their day.

Today is also Peach Blossom Day! It is a day for girls to celebrate the fact that they are girls. I had no idea what this had to do with peach blossoms, so I looked it up. Peach blossoms were used in chinese festivals to symbolize happy marriage. They also insinuated gentility, composure, and tranquility, which are all quite lady-like things to have. So ladies, have fun being ladies today!

Today is also National Anthem Day! Francis Scott Key's song was officially made America's national anthem today. Show your patriotism by singing the national anthem at some point during your day. If you do it in a crowded place, see how many people join in!

That's it for today! Triple holiday, though! On the 3rd, no less! Pretty neat!

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Oh, you know, nothing much.

Today is Old Stuff Day! At first I thought it would be celebrating actual old things that I had lying around my room, and while there is a lot of things lying around my room (I really need to clean), I wasn't sure if any could really be called "old". Luckily for me, that's NOT what today is about. A few quick google searches landed me a "How to celebrate Old Stuff Day". There, I found out that it was a day to acknowledge the common saying of "Nothing much, same old stuff" when someone is asked what's going on in their life or what they've been up to. Today is dedicated to actually finding out if there is literally nothing new at all in their lives at all, and if there isn't, to help them change that. It's also a day to do the same thing introspectively. Change up your daily routine somehow to make sure YOU don't answer a "What's up?" with "Eh. Same old, Same old."

That's actually what this whole holiday-a-day blog thing was meant to do for me. Last year was very routine and dissatisfying, so while looking for a way to make it a little more interesting, I found out that there is a holiday every day. Since all of the holidays are different, and it's daily, it worked just well enough for a person with my "Right now" mindset to want to get involved in. 24 hours of celebrating something, and then onto something else. It actually has changed up my daily routine, and thus far I feel safe in saying that this year will not be like the others. Both in this sense, and just a feeling that somethings gonna happen. So today, I will do the exact opposite of what I did last year: Go somewhere and have meaningful conversations with people.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

P.S. Incase you are wondering, last year's March 2nd was probably video games and college classes.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Pig out!

Today is National Pig Day! It's exactly what it sounds like, and can be celebrated by doing almost anything pig related EXCEPT eating food made out of pig. It celebrates how smart and clever pigs are, and there are even fairs in some places dedicated to the pig. Pigs are just as capable of learning tricks as dogs, which makes them a great pet when domesticated. I know what you're thinking, "Aren't pigs quite large and very very stinky? Why would I want that in my home?". Well, if you are worried about size, you may want to try looking into Micro Pigs (also known as teacup pigs). As for the smell, it all depends on how you take care of it. Dogs really stink sometimes, too but you may not notice because you "wuv dem so muwch" that you don't notice how bad they stank. Bathe your pets!!

...*ahem*... sorry.

Today is also Peanut Butter Lover's Day! That means that.... wait what? There's a day for that?! ... Peanut Butter is only one of the greatest flavors mankind has ever had bequeathed upon them. From putting it on toast for breakfast, celery for a health conscious snack, mixing it with jelly for a light sandwich, it's even in some of the best desserts out there! I love peanut butter! You should, too! If you haven't ever had Peanut Butter, you need to find a jar as fast as possible and eat it. Yes, it is even great alone.

Well, I'm hereby choosing to mix these holidays together and go pig out on some peanut butter. I'll need to carry some mints, though... P.B. has a strong lingering scent.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle