Today is Johnny Appleseed Day! Even though he died today, he is celebrated in March because it is planting season. Obviously it would be a little hard to go out and celebrate by planting your own apple trees, selling them to people, preaching sermons, and donation the little money you make to poor all while slowly but surely becoming an American legend. So instead, just try to put a lot of apples into your diet today. Out of all the things that I've asked you to participate in eating all day, this is by far the healthiest! So take advantage of it! Besides, apples are the most versatile of fruits, in my humble opinion. Just think about how many things they have going for them. Really think about it.
Today is also Worship of Tools Day! Why the word 'worship' was chosen, I do not know. It's not a holiday for some weird obscure religion that literal worships garage-dwelling apparatus. No, it's just a day to give tools to people who appreciate them, or maybe just appreciate them yourselves. Most websites claim this to be a "man day" although they usually also said you shouldn't ignore the females who also work with tools. I'm frankly just thankful that the day is talking about the kind of 'tool' that it is.
Today is also my birthday. To celebrate, ask other people "Did you know it's Kyle's birthday today?" and when they ask "Who is Kyle?", then you just point them on over to this blog. That's all I want from you, internet. It's a little greedy, so if you don't like that idea, then get yourself something nice and tell me what you got yourself. If it helps, ask other people to chip in for a gift for me, and then use that money on something for yourself. After all, that's technically kinda what I just asked for as a gift. I accept no responsibility for loud arguments you may or may not have with your close ones after you have done that, though.
Thanks for reading!