Thursday, September 29, 2011


"Today is National Coffee Day!" Is what I would say if you all didn't already know. I've had about 5 or 6 texts today asking "Is today really national coffee day?!" It's almost like they were all hopped up on somethi- ... oh right... coffee. Well, I guess it does make it a lot easier on me, because you all have already celebrated. I have to finish writing this before my coffee gets old. Although I can't decide how I'd like it. Hot? Iced? Black? Cream? Sugar? I don't want to wreck the holiday by drinking a bad cup!

Thanks for reading!

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Today is Stupid

Today is Ask a Stupid Question Day! You may be asking: "Kyle, how do I celebrate Ask a Stupid Question Day?" Well, don't worry, because you already have. Just by asking me that! The entire idiom today is referring to is "Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer."

The day was created in the 80's by teachers who wanted the children to be more comfortable asking questions in class, since the 80's were when children started noticing how dumb their questions could be sometimes
because some children were uncomfortable asking stupid things, knowing that others would point and laugh 
because the teachers wanted to have more stories about the dumb kids in class to share in the lounge
because the teachers knew that peer pressure was causing some of the children in class to withhold some of their questions, which wasn't conducive to a learning atmosphere.

You can celebrate today by asking all the stupid questions you want! Some might say "There is no such thing as a stupid question". However, there is! If you've been anywhere ever, you know this for a fact. I'm not saying that the person asking the question is stupid, but the question definitely is. Now, I usually give them the benefit of the doubt and assume that they hadn't thought it through quite as much as they should have, but today is a free pass to ask before you think! I'm not here to judge. Unless I'm judging how stupid your question is... but I won't judge you. Unless you wear an "I'm with Stupid" shirt. That means that you're stupid enough to hang out with stupid people often enough to wear a t-shirt in order to warn people... and I might judge you for that a little.

Thanks for reading!

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Crushing Crushes

Today is Crush a Can Day! There's something addictive and fun about crushing a can. Whether it be crushed by hand or by foot, the only disappointing part is that you can really only do it once. Well, unless you empty a lot of cans, of course. I know that I rarely ever throw away a coke can that I haven't crushed, because it's such a deeply set habit I've made for myself. It's like a one-use-only stress ball that makes a cooler noise. Today is a pretty easy one to celebrate, too. Simply make sure to crush your fair share of cans today. Just try not to cut your hand... or foot if you do it barefoot.

Thanks for reading!

Monday, September 26, 2011

Triple Threat!

Today is National Good Neighbor Day! You can spend today by either actively being good, or passively not bothering your neighbor to death! It really depends on what kind of neighbor you already are. OR you can take the even more dangerous SUPER-active route, and instead of letting your neighbor borrow a cup of sugar, pre-emptively strike and give them a cup of sugar randomly! It'll be good fun.

Today is also National Pancakes Day! Pancakes are delicious and sometimes even nutritious. You usually eat them for breakfast, although you can really eat it anytime you want! Because gosh darn it, I'm an adult and I can eat whatever I so please! Sorry to all the kids who aren't as free in the culinary areas of their life, but I bet your parents will make you some if you ask real nice. Pro tip: Make a pouty face. Bonus points for quivering bottom lips and/or crocodile tears. (Sorry to the parents whose children may follow this advice and cry at you until you make them pancakes.)

Today is also Johnny Appleseed Day (Part II)! You might remember that we've already celebrated this day way back in March. That's because March 11th is when he died, and today is when he was born. Not in that order, of course. You can celebrate by spreading the story of Johnny Appleseed and how he spread trees all around the upper eastern areas of America. He was also a very religious person and donated any of the money given to him, although he rarely even accepted donations.

Bonus points to whoever makes Apple Pancakes and gives them to their neighbor.

Thanks for reading!

Sunday, September 25, 2011


Today is...
A day dedicated to the coolness that is one of the most prominent forms of storytelling? Count me in! Comic books are so varied, that there is at least one series that everyone can claim they have enjoyed reading. Although some of them might refer to their comics as "graphic novels" for reasons I still don't completely understand.

Take some time out of your day to remember which ones you read when you were a child, and the ones you still read now. I remember making my own comics with my friends in elementary school. Of course I couldn't draw then (not that I'm amazing at it now (see above picture)), so I used the easiest style of character I could. So the video game character Kirby was the star of most of my comics.

So spend some time today reading, talking about, making, or even just reminiscing about comics. I hear some comic stores give out free comics today, though. I'll be looking into that.

Thanks for reading!

Saturday, September 24, 2011

So Shiny...

Today is The Festival of the Latest Novelties! I've had considerable trouble getting my computer to run properly, and today, I took it (for the second time) to my tech-savvy friend's house so he could help me fix it, and I could help him move a very VERY heavy bronze indian statue. Thats a story for another day. Well, the indian part is... I'm telling you about the first part right now. We finally got it fixed (knock on wood) and I can finally enjoy the shiny new computer. Granted, a computer isn't really as much of a novelty item so much as a whoopie cushion or a chinese finger-trap might be, but most of the video games I will be installing and playing are equally as eclectic. However, if it appeases some of the more literal viewers I have, I will have you know that I also played with one of those cups that have a ball attached to it. I think their called Cup-and-Balls? Either that or Ball-in-a-Cups. Whatever they're called, rest assured that it's a very original name. Or at the very least, it's descriptive. Tell your mom you want a Cup n' Ball, and there is really no other toy she should come home with unless she was just straight up not even listening to you.

Thanks for reading!

Friday, September 23, 2011

King Me

Today is Checkers Day and Dogs in Politics Day! I say them both at once because they are both the same holiday! More than a half-century ago today, Nixon gave a speech entailing his alleged use of campaign money for personal things. In this speech, he mentioned that his daughter's had recently been gifted a dog which they chose to name "Checkers". This was, according to history, the most important part of the speech because there is a holiday about it! So whether you want to go out and buy a dog, play checkers, or just research what presidents had dogs, it's all fair game. With the possible exception of playing checkers. That, in actuality, has very little to do with today. Still fun, though.

Thanks for reading!

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Dear Shire-y

Today is Hobbit Day! I, Ferdirand of Nobottle, am a big fan of Hobbits and The Shire. It's just a beautiful place. As any C.S. Lewis fan would know, it was Tolkien who wrote about hobbits. And any well-read Tolkien fan would know that today is in celebration of Bilbo and Frodo! The best way to celebrate today would be to re-enact the stories of these two heros, but I suppose you could settle for reading about it instead.

Today is also Dear Diary Day! I more or less count this blog as a diary... er.. journal. Whatever. I never got the point of differentiating between those two words. I always assumed that one (diary) was for introspective thoughts, and that the other (journal) was to record the events of a journey. Since I'm really not traveling TOO much while blogging, I'd say this is definitely closer to a diary. That is, of course, unless you take mental or emotional journeys into account. But that's just semantics, really. Celebrate today by narrating your life out loud. Why? Because it's more fun that way.

Every second of it. Out loud. Every Thought. ... Go!

Thanks for reading!

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Bunches of Thanks

Today is World Gratitude Day! Aw snap, ya'll! Stuff just got real up in here. You weren't expecting to have to be thankful for anything until Thanksgiving? Well, you best start thinking of something that's happening right now to be thankful for! It's like when a teacher calls on you when you didn't have your hand raised and you freak out because you didn't prepare? Well, that's what I'm doing to you. Here's a quick list of things that I'm quite thankful for so far this year.

1) My recent trip to the UK with Lift Ministries. It was my third time over there and it gets more intense and awesome every year. I can't wait to see what happens next year!

2) My job. It took forever to get one, but I finally did. Also, it's at a bakery and everything is delicious there. You just can't say that about working many places.

3) My friend Lori, who thought that my holiday celebrating was neat, and has even started a blog of her own describing her celebrations and/or thoughts on the holidays. She even found some holidays that were different than mine (My list... may or may not be outdated... by two years... almost three), so you'll get twice the holidays for half the money! Which... is still $0.00, because they are free blogs... OFF TRACK! I was trying to say that her involvement and interest in this has re-kindled my excited-ness in my own blog! (I was getting lackadaisical lately, and also mad at the food holidays for being so... prevalent.) I will do my best to not do that now!

4) Last but not definitely not least, I'm thankful for my loyal viewers. All 8-27 daily viewers (Yeah I'm watchin' you) that read this blog. It may sound small, but that's a good room-full of people. And they aren't always the same ones either! I get people I know coming up to me asking about what holiday it is, and it's all fun times! Without your viewership, I would basically be talking to myself. Which, while sometimes therapeutic, becomes creepy if done too often. So thank you!

Today is also the International Banana Festival Day! I hear tell that this is a Kentucky thing, but that doesn't make sense to me because of the word 'International' in the title. However, from the pictures I've seen, it involves eating a lot of bananas. I am totally down for that. I've eaten banana bread, banana pudding, a banana and peanut butter sandwich, and even a banana smoothie! Feel free to experiment with banana recipes today, too. And just so you don't forget today is banana day, it helps to have this stuck in your head forever.

Thanks for reading!

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Painful or Fruity

Today is National Punch Day! I'm gonna be honest with you, I'm not quite sure whether or not we're talking fruity concoctions or mean interactions here. From what I've researched, it looks like the day is leaning towards being about the drink, but I won't hold it against you if you go around punching people. They might, and the state officials might, but I won't hold a grudge.

As it turns out, "Punch" comes from the Hindustani word "Pench", which means 'five'. And since the punch was made with five ingredients, they called it after how many ingredients are in it. I'm really glad we don't do that with everything, or our restaurant menus would be a lot less fun to read.

However, I can't say all that without also pointing out that a fist is made of five fingers, so physically punching wouldn't technically be a wrong way to celebrate. ... Just sayin'

Thanks for reading!

Monday, September 19, 2011


Today be National Butterscotch Pudding Day! Ye may best know butterscotch as that tough little candy that yer grandma be handing ya right before she pinches yer cheeks as tight as a sail in a storm. There also be a fairrrrrly pop'lar puddin' with the same flavor! Once again, I turned to my most trusted merchant of pudding for this parrrrticular day. Jell-O. They always be making the best flavourrrs, and they always be as fine quality as a king's sheets. But don't take it from an old salt like me, try it yerself!

Today also be Talk Like A Pirate Day!

Thanks fer readin'!
~Captain Kyle

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Molding Toys

Today is National Play-Doh Day! I'm sure all the people my age and above, and possibly some below have had Play-Doh at some point in their lives. It was and hopefully still is a major staple 'toy' in a normal childhood. I say 'toy', but Play-Doh is so much more than that. It's... anything. Literally. Well... not literally, but it's very versatile. You can make it into whatever shape you want, and then use a little something called imagination to make it real. Imagination doesn't come with Play-Doh, but Play-Doh can play a great part in activating it. As can any toy with such versatility. Plus, what a great business model. "Hey lets give kids some colored blobs to make into whatever toy they want". Play-Doh is making bank off of that business model. Not that I hold it against them. I mean, it's a great business model. And I love playdoh. I usually made picnic scenes.

Thanks for reading!

Saturday, September 17, 2011

I Like Apples

Today is National Apple Dumpling Day! Apples are my favorite fruit by far, as I'm pretty sure I've mentioned before. Because how could I not have? I've talked to you every day for a year. Some people I know don't even get three days of knowing me without knowing I thoroughly enjoy an apple or two. ... Anyway, my love for apples extends past the fruit alone and onto it's flavor. So what I'm really trying to get at here is that I ate an apple dumpling and enjoyed it. I would tell you more, but Fawlty Towers is really distracting.

Thanks for reading!

Friday, September 16, 2011

Seattle Rocks

Today is Stay Away From Seattle Day! Done and done. I've stayed at least 1,660.38 miles away from Seattle all day! How far away did you stay?

Today is also Collect Rocks Day! I didn't really have time to collect that many rocks... But I did spill some salt in my shoe while at work today! And salt is a mineral! So that counts right? Please? ... I walked around with salt in my shoe for 3 hours. I'm taking what I can get.

Thanks for reading!

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Feels Like Felt

Today is Felt Hat Day! Today is pretty easy to celebrate. Just wear a felt hat. It can be the traditional 18-1900's style hat, but really any hat will do as long as it's made of felt. Since my mom is in charge of a lot of costumes at the school/church, and I used to be in theatre myself, it was almost too easy to find a felt hat to wear. So I wore it while eating breakfast before I went to work, and I wore it while doing my daily web surfing when I got home. The only thing about the one I found is that it gets awfully itchy after a while. The seam is just in an unfortunate place for the way my head is shaped. Oh well, a good hat is hard to find.

Thanks for reading!

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Thousandth Food Holiday

Today is National Cream Filled Donut Day! It's a food day. You know the drill. Go eat a cream filled donut. Even though you know the jelly filled are better.

Thanks for reading!

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

A Little Stitious

Today is Defy Superstition Day! Defying superstition is a pretty easy thing to do. Especially with science.  My personal studies show that people who break mirrors are only experiencing a little bit of 'bad luck' only by merit of the fact that their mirror is now broken. There are no further instances of exceptionally bad luck that surface immediately, in the short term, or even in the long term. There may be other instances that aren't exactly fortuitous, but they aren't an effect of the mirror breaking. The event's significance is simply amplified in importance simply because the person experiencing it has written it up as inevitable due to their original mistake of breaking a mirror. I don't know why people do it, though. Maybe we find some comfort in finding any sort of scapegoat to stick all of our downfalls onto so whatever happens to us isn't completely our fault. That way we don't go insane with the knowledge that maybe we do, in fact, stink at handling mirrors.

... Anyway, you can celebrate today by walking under ladders or having a black cat cross your path. It doesn't count if you cross it's path. That's good luck. For the cat.

Thanks for reading!

Late Night Shake

Today (or more accurately: yesterday) is National Chocolate Milkshake Day! Now, I haven't had a source of internet until now, so I'll have to ask you apologies for telling you about September 12th's holiday at 1am on the 13th. However, if anything could make me less stressed about something that is as unstressful as a not-very-well-known-at-all blog, it's a good ol' fashioned chocolate milkshake. Which I have had three of today. One for every meal. Holiday: Celebrated.

Thanks for reading!

Sunday, September 11, 2011


Today is No News Is Good News Day! Given the history of today, I'm still unsure if this holiday would have been created before or after the events of 9/11. The phrase is to be taken to say that if no news comes, then that in itself is good news. I suppose in a way, that it's true. Seeing as, if you have a project that you've assigned people to and no one ever comes to you with news (aside from "It's done"), then the project must be going well. Either that or your employees are too scared of you to mention anything that does go wrong. The same can be said for media news. If it's a slow news day, it's probably a pretty good day over-all.

With that said, it has been a decade since the 9/11 events, so take some time out of your day to remember and honor all of the people that were affected that day.

Thanks for reading!

Saturday, September 10, 2011

Does Not Compute

Today is Swap Ideas Day! Look at this!

That's my broken-as-all-get-out desktop PC. I've taken it on a journey to one my very tech-savvy friend's houses for him to tell me what on earth happened to it. See, I came home one day and it was off (as per the norm), except this time, it wouldn't turn on. Well, it would, but only for a few seconds. So today, me and my bud are going to be swapping ideas on what exactly went down. And by swapping ideas, I mean that he'll tell me what happened, and I will say "Hmmm...", nod my head understandingly, then ask "So what does that mean?".

Thanks for reading!

Friday, September 9, 2011

Bear Necessities

Today is Teddy Bear Day! Teddy Bears are an important part of any person's childhood. They are friends, guardians, and don't mind being pillows every now and then. Almost everyone I know has a bear or some sort of stuffed animal that they cuddled when they were younger. I had a plethora of stuffed animals when I was young, but few have had quite the amount of memories as a certain bear has shared with me. Potato Joe (Seen below at a bear-friendly dance club) has shared most, if not all, of my journeys to places.

He gets a little CRAZY sometimes

Potato Joe has quite the tale to tell. One of my close cronies, Meagan has a birthday two days apart from mine. As it so happened, our birthdays or, even more often, the day in between them fell on a church day. So we would celebrate by a present-swap. However, my senior year of high school, I went on a trip to colorado with the rest of my class during the week of our birthdays! GASP!

So, we decided that the saturday I got back, we would make up for breaking our annual tradition by spending the entire day together, filling it with whatever activities we could find. So from 8am-really late, we went to malls, restaurants, parks, and all sorts of time-filling activities such as Apples to Apples (We had more people by then, don't worry). The most important and memorable event, however, was the spur of the moment decision to wander into Build-A-Bear.

It was decided that we would make matching bears, so we first looked at clothes. We found the best  option were the denim overalls/dress. It was therefore decided that they would be farmers/artisans. Potato Joe and Sweet Pea (Seen below discussing how her farmville is far more efficient than yours) were born. Potato Joe now rides in my car in the back middle seat, since he swears it's the safest, and enjoys all the places I take him to.

"Look, have YOU ever had a farm? No? Okay then."

What's your bear, and how did you get him/her?
yeah that's right I'm turning tables and making you tell a story.

Thanks for reading!

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Nuts and Pardons

Today is National Date Nut Bread Day! I've said many-a-time how few-a-ways there are to tell you to eat food. And frankly, I don't like nuts in bread because they crunchify what should otherwise be a very soft and crumbly texture. Especially when it comes to cakes. Although I guess it is called date-nut bread, not date-nut cake. But I mean who uses it for a sandwich or any other regular bread-like use? We call cinnamon bread a bread, but I never use it for anything but a dessert. Let's face it, if a bread can be called 'rich', 'thick', or 'sweet', it's cake and should be treated as such.

Today is also Pardon Day! This day is a reminder of the day that Nixon was granted a pardon from any affiliation with waters, gates, or any combination that could made of the two. Or something like that. I slept through Modern History. Whatever the case may be, today is a day to both ask for and give pardons to others. Whether they should be or not! Pardons for everyone! However, please note that this does not allow you to do horrible things, then ask for pardons. That's just childish.
Thanks for reading!

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Nor Broken Internet

Today is Neither Rain Nor Snow Day! Today is fairly obviously a reference to the postal service, who claims that neither rain nor snow will stop their delivery. For the most part it's true, too. Aside from snow, which in Texas has been known to scare off even the truck driverest of truck drivers.

As luck would have it, my house's internet doesn't work, so I went to my old high school to mooch of of their internet. Just so I could tell you about today! Commitment!

Thanks for reading!

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Don't Not Do Something

Today is Fight Procrastination Day! Today is a day to do whatever you've been putting off. My plan, now that I've finished building my desk and bookcase, I will try moving as much of my bedroom furniture around in order to make room for it. Then I will set up my PC, then I will empty my closet. Then paint it. Then go buy an OS for my pc. Then re-download everything I had on my old pc from steam.

I can't promise everything I just said will happen, but I am saying I will try to do it. Or at the very least try to avoid not doing it.

Thanks for reading!

Monday, September 5, 2011

Fashionably Late

Today is Be Late For Something Day! Today is pretty self explanatory, although I think I should warn you about things that you should definitely not be late for today.

- Your job
- Your child's birth
- Your wedding
- Your court hearing
- Your flight

Anything else is really fair game I suppose. My one rule for myself today is "As long as it doesn't cost me more than 15ish dollars". I should also mention that by 'late' I don't mean a few minutes late to the business meeting and you bring everyone breakfast. Everybody will instantly forgive you. No, you have to be significantly late, but DON'T miss whatever you are supposed to be late to. If you do that, you'll be never. Always better late than never.

Thanks for reading!

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Sunday Edition

Today is Newspaper Carrier Day! Now, I may sometimes frown upon the severe advancement of technology, but one thing I do appreciate about it is that I can get my news anywhere. One thing I hate about real newspapers is that they aren't connected. Now, this may be all well and good for sharing the newspaper with friends, or taking out certain sections to read at your own leisure. However, for me (a naturally messy person who wants everything to be neat), a large stack of related, yet unconnected papers is a nightmare. Not to mention that it's thin and tears easily. However, this isn't about newspapers, it's about the carriers. I won't judge the person by the stuff they carry.

These people, if I have anything to say about them, are excellent aims. Well, first I suppose I should explain that when I see "Newspaper Carrier" I think of paperboys (or girls). Which makes me think of the video game Paperboy. If real life is anything like video games, then paperboys (or girls) have a strong arm AND a very precise aim. Sometimes precise enough to launch it into a mailbox from across the street! So, give whoever supplies you with your paper a round of applause today! It'll be easy if you live in a small town, but if not... shoot an email at the Newspaper HQ and let 'em know.

Thanks for reading!

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Attention Span

Today is Skyscraper Day! Now, I've never been in anything that I would call a skyscraper that I can remember at the moment. However I can tell you that there was a map on Mario Kart 64 in versus mode called "Skyscraper" and it was just an incredible amount of fun. I really miss those days when me and my family would sit and play those family friendly games together. Such games included but were not limited to: Mario Kart 64, 007: GoldenEye, Star Fox 64, and a bunch of other games that I remember, but forgot the names of at the moment. ... Anyway... skyscraper day.

Thanks for reading!

Friday, September 2, 2011

Detated Capa

Today is National Beheading Day! While I couldn't find any reason as to why today was a holiday dedicated to decapitation, from what I know of what previous holidays I've celebrated, I'd accept the reason of "Why not?" with just as much readiness as I would an explanation from a professor of holidays. Which is a job that I think should exist.

There have been a lot of fairly famous beheadings throughout history. Most have been kings and queens, but there were plenty of not-so-well known ones as well. After all, it was a major, if not gruesome, form of execution back in the day.

Now since I don't own a guillotine (not even one of those miniature ones that cut cigars), I can't truly celebrate the meaning of today. Plus, there would have been a few legal issues to work out had I gone through with it. So, instead, I settled for simple eating gummy bears head first. Although, I suppose I could find a video game or two with some beheadings. Mostly zombie ones... does undead decapitation count?

Thanks for reading!

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Coco Would Work, Too.

Today is Emma M. Nutt Day! For those without Google or the complete Encyclopedia Britannica, Emma M. Nutt was the first woman to get a job as a telephone operator. Soon after her entrance into 'the biz', the people running the phone companies realized that people preferred the sound of her calm, soothing voice to that of all the male voices. Even though we rarely ever talk to telephone operators these days, the tactic of using a woman's voice in automated calls is still fairly prominent with big businesses. 

Aside from how she could be accredited with changing that part of the telephone industry, she was also smart and efficient. She could reportedly recite any number from the New England Telephone Company at will. For you children out there, I should explain that we didn't used to have phones that could save numbers, so memorizing them or writing them down was the only way you'd be able to keep them. It's surprising to find anyone under 16-18 years old that knows even just 10 phone numbers off the top of their head.

But today isn't a day to talk to younger people about how lame they are (that's an every day thing). Today is a day to remember the inspiration that Emma Nutt was, and to reflect on how many hilarious names you could come up with for your children if your last name was 'Nutt'. I call dibs on "Hazel Nutt" and "Mac Adamia Nutt"

Thanks for reading!