I Hereby Decree

Today is Start Your Own Country Day! Many people have mentioned that I've been in my own unique state for most of my life, so I guess I am overdue for an upgrade to my property. That makes today the perfect chance to do so! I hereby claim all land within 5 feet of where-ever I go to be my country. Now that may not be technically legal in most other countries, but luckily: it is in mine! Which is, in case you haven't heard, everywhere I go. The great thing about my country, though, is that it automatically assumes the laws of whatever country it is surrounded by. So for now, my country follows America's laws. It just makes the paperwork easier. Every good country needs a name, too. ... Actually every country needs a name regardless of whether it's good or not. Enough of that nonsense, my country is named... Kyleton? Wait that's a city sounding name. Let's go with Kylia. That's good. It rolls off the tongue. It also sounds like Hylia which I am totally all for.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle (King/Ambassador/Everyone of Kylia)

Aw Nuts

Today is National Nut Day! Today is a day to simply enjoy, consume, and appreciate nuts. Not necessarily in that order. There are a lot of nuts out there for you to try, from chestnuts to red bopple nuts. Although bopple nuts aren't usually eaten... they CAN be. They're related to the macadamia for what that's worth. It's usually just an ornament, though. Whatever you do, don't you even THINK about letting peanuts in on this holiday. They're legumes. They just pretend to be nuts. ... posers.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Dear Shire-y

Today is Hobbit Day! I, Ferdirand of Nobottle, am a big fan of Hobbits and The Shire. It's just a beautiful place. As any C.S. Lewis fan would know, it was Tolkien who wrote about hobbits. And any well-read Tolkien fan would know that today is in celebration of Bilbo and Frodo! The best way to celebrate today would be to re-enact the stories of these two heros, but I suppose you could settle for reading about it instead.

Today is also Dear Diary Day! I more or less count this blog as a diary... er.. journal. Whatever. I never got the point of differentiating between those two words. I always assumed that one (diary) was for introspective thoughts, and that the other (journal) was to record the events of a journey. Since I'm really not traveling TOO much while blogging, I'd say this is definitely closer to a diary. That is, of course, unless you take mental or emotional journeys into account. But that's just semantics, really. Celebrate today by narrating your life out loud. Why? Because it's more fun that way.

Every second of it. Out loud. Every Thought. ... Go!

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Friendly Reminder of Friendliness

Today is Be An Angel Day! Today is a day to take some time out of your oh-so-busy schedule and try your hardest to be an angel. Before you mad scientists get excited, I'm not talking about grafting wings onto your back and bolting a yellow neon loop above your head. No, today is much simpler than that. It's a day to do something good to another human. Or animal I suppose. Angels like animals, too. I'd tell you what I did for today, but telling about my own deeds seems non-angelic. Even saying I'm not telling you because I want to be angelic seems like it's not very angelic. ... Well, just do something nice for/to/at someone today. Today's another day that should be a year-round, 24/7 kind of deal. Like when your parents used to remind you to say 'thank you', you shouldn't have to be reminded anymore. We shouldn't have to be told to be nice to others. But we were, so let's go on ahead and do it.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

The Mob Doesn't Like Rats.

Today is Ratcatcher's Day! It celebrates the tale of the Pied Piper leading the rats out of the town of Hamlin. If you've read the tale, you know that since the town wouldn't pay the piper for his services, he took the children away from the town and... drowned them? I think. Maybe I'm mixing up myths, but that's how I seem to remember it. And I'm to lazy to google it. If you didn't read the story then I'm sorry for the possible spoiler.

Today is a day to do one of many things. You could not pay the debts you owe and learn the hard way what will happen if you don't. You could be a pied piper and teach people what happens to them when they don't pay their debts. ... I just realized what horrible advice that is. Especially if the mafia reads my blog. Er.... not that i mean any offense, Don...

I should go lay low for a while. Maybe play some Mouse Trap. Both the game and the movie. Or was the movie called Mouse Hunt? ... again: Too lazy to google.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Better than Escargot

Today is National Chocolate Eclair Day! Aaaw yeah it's time for another chocolate based food holiday. I gotta say, when I started this holiday every day thing, I didn't even fathom how much food I was going to be eating. I'm not complaining, though. Especially if there is chocolate involved. Eclairs are a french pastry made kind of like cream filled donuts, but stretched one way so that it looks longer. It's also made of a different dough and topped with icing. It's usually filled with fancy things like mexican vanilla or dutch raspberry moose, but today you're just looking for the good ol' chocolate. Luckily for me, I work at a bakery, so finding one was absolutely no problem at all. If you need help finding an eclair, though. ... Look in a bakery.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

76 Trombones

Today is Buy A Musical Instrument Day! It should be really obvious what you need to do today, so I'm just going to skip ahead to what I wanted to do, why I couldn't, and what I did instead. I really desired to buy a ukulele, but those are slightly too expensive for a poor southern boy such as myself. I found out about the existence of mandolins again, and I actually COULD afford one, and also liked the sound better than ukulele. However by "could afford one" I mean that it would be about all I could afford. I wouldn't even be able to buy a pack of gum if I bought one right now. So I of course, settled for the next best thing! A Mandolin app on the iPhone. It wasn't free ($1.99), so it TOTALLY counts as buying an instrument... right? Anyway, I'll be playing with it until I can afford the real thing without plunging myself into the red.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Nobody Likes Licorice.

Today is National Jelly Bean Day! Jelly beans are perhaps a candy category all on their own. There are so many flavors that I think it has to be almost impossible for anyone to not like at least one. I know that I'm a fan of what I like to call the "Pure Flavors". Things like Orange, Cherry, Apple, or other fruits are always welcome to my mixture. I've never been a fan of Popcorn, Coconut, or even Roasted Marshmallow. I like to mix the pure flavors on my own and see what recipes make different tastes thank you very much. And so help me if I find one Licorice even touching on of mine I will flip out. That stuff is nasty and it wrecks everyone's day.

Now, all of this doesn't matter at all if it's not Jelly Belly brand, because they are the flavor masters. No other jelly bean can stand up to them. If you are planning on making your own jelly bean company, then don't. It would be a waste of money because they own the industry. Not in a bad way either. They are just that good. Their one downfall is that they keep making Licorice even though no one likes it. People who say they like it are liars. I've tried it. It isn't good at all. Stop faking it. Even the name "Licorice" tastes bad. People who call Twizzlers "Red Licorice" almost ruined Twizzlers for me.

Here's a graph I didn't make:

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Ya Done Goofed

Today is National Goof-off Day! I at first thought that today would be celebrated by fun, pointless games and having a questionable sanity in public, but as it turns out, the dictionary says that a goof-off is a lazy person who does less than their fair share of work. I find this odd because when I'm lazy, I'm called lazy. I've only been called a goof-off when I joke around in a goofy way. So I'm saying that this holiday is open to debate on how to celebrate it. To be safe, I've decided to keep it simple and be slightly lazy while still having fun. I choose to watch both Goofy Movies. That should satisfy my need for seeing funny hijinks and antics happen, along with satisfying the dictionary's need for laziness (as I will be on a couch or in bed for at least an extra 4 hours).

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Hard to Balance

Today is Be Humble Day. It is a day to keep away from bragging about ourselves or trying to make ourselves sound better than we are. Being humble, as I have recently found, is not how I once thought of it. I once thought that to be humble, you almost have to deny your own talents. If someone asked if I was good at something, in a vain attempt to be humble, I would say "No" even if I was actually gifted in that area. That's not being humble. That's just lying. In fact sometimes, I would use that to get out of work, and if they saw me doing well at the task later, I would say "Well, I was just trying to be humble". No, being humble isn't about that at all. That's being humble for the sake of trying to get people to see how humble you are, which doesn't fit into the logic of what being humble is.

Being humble is knowing your talents, and neither overselling or underselling yourself on them. You shouldn't be out to make yourself look like you are better than what you might really be (you'll get caught pretty fast), and you shouldn't have the false humility of saying "Oh, no I'm no good at that" when you are actually quite decent. It's a very delicate balance, but one of the most rewarding virtues there is, in my opinion. It helps you become honest with both yourself and others, which can really take a lot of stress away from your day-to-day.

Obviously, no one can become perfectly humble in just one day. Today is just a reminder of something we should be working on daily. Pay extra attention to what you say when someone approaches you asking about what you can do or have done, and try to remain humble. It's hard to do, for me especially, because I love telling stories. Sometimes I like to... spice up my life stories to make them more entertaining for the listener. So that's something for me to work on. Try to see if you can find some way to become a little more humble, and work at it daily. And have a great day!

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle