Babbwing Bwog

Today is Babbling Day! I originally saw today and thought that it was basically the same as 'rambling', but unfortunately for me (fortunately for you), it isn't. Babbling is the kind of talking that babies do, which some would argue is none at all. They just make coos and gurgles. So, I've devised several ways to celebrate today.

Celebration Method #1

Find a baby (preferably one with parents you have met at least once before), and talk to it. Try to decipher what it's trying to say. This method obviously increases in difficulty as the babies you are talking with get younger. ...Er... the babies shouldn't be getting younger unless you know the Button family. I'll just trust you know what I meant.

Celebration Method #2


You could find your very closet friend and talk to them all day using only noises. They don't have to be loud or obtrusive noises. Most good friends can read so deep into the meaning of even an eye twitch, that making a noise is almost like spelling it out for them.

Celebration Method #3


Talk to everyone as if they were a baby. This could be the riskiest method, as not only would you weird everyone out, you would also offend the vast majority of them. Most people don't take kindly to being talked to in baby-talk. For some reason it makes them feel like their being talk down to? But I'm not. I just tink deir sho precioush twying so hawd to figuwe out deir wittle pwoblwms!


Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Bunches of Thanks

Today is World Gratitude Day! Aw snap, ya'll! Stuff just got real up in here. You weren't expecting to have to be thankful for anything until Thanksgiving? Well, you best start thinking of something that's happening right now to be thankful for! It's like when a teacher calls on you when you didn't have your hand raised and you freak out because you didn't prepare? Well, that's what I'm doing to you. Here's a quick list of things that I'm quite thankful for so far this year.

1) My recent trip to the UK with Lift Ministries. It was my third time over there and it gets more intense and awesome every year. I can't wait to see what happens next year!

2) My job. It took forever to get one, but I finally did. Also, it's at a bakery and everything is delicious there. You just can't say that about working many places.

3) My friend Lori, who thought that my holiday celebrating was neat, and has even started a blog of her own describing her celebrations and/or thoughts on the holidays. She even found some holidays that were different than mine (My list... may or may not be outdated... by two years... almost three), so you'll get twice the holidays for half the money! Which... is still $0.00, because they are free blogs... OFF TRACK! I was trying to say that her involvement and interest in this has re-kindled my excited-ness in my own blog! (I was getting lackadaisical lately, and also mad at the food holidays for being so... prevalent.) I will do my best to not do that now!

4) Last but not definitely not least, I'm thankful for my loyal viewers. All 8-27 daily viewers (Yeah I'm watchin' you) that read this blog. It may sound small, but that's a good room-full of people. And they aren't always the same ones either! I get people I know coming up to me asking about what holiday it is, and it's all fun times! Without your viewership, I would basically be talking to myself. Which, while sometimes therapeutic, becomes creepy if done too often. So thank you!

Today is also the International Banana Festival Day! I hear tell that this is a Kentucky thing, but that doesn't make sense to me because of the word 'International' in the title. However, from the pictures I've seen, it involves eating a lot of bananas. I am totally down for that. I've eaten banana bread, banana pudding, a banana and peanut butter sandwich, and even a banana smoothie! Feel free to experiment with banana recipes today, too. And just so you don't forget today is banana day, it helps to have this stuck in your head forever.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Johnny's Tale

Today is National Tug-Of-War Tournament Day! Uuuuuuuh.... STORY TIME!

...

The air was hot and only amplified by the river water dripping from the hair of the participants. This was the moment everyone had been waiting for. Everything other match was merely a warm up. Little Johnny smelled like potatoes from the sack race, and his older sister, Susan, was behind him and she still had red marks on her ankle from the three legged race. Behind Susan was his mother who had no noticeable stains, since she had only participated in the egg-spoon obstacle course. At the back was his dad with feet placed firmly into the ground and a face with a beard almost drenched in cherry syrup from the pie eating contest. He was the anchor. There to make sure the rope never pulled past where he stood. Johnny, Susan, and Mom would be doing most of the pulling.

Across a large puddle of mud that had been created not moments ago stood the opponents. The Trapper family. They had 5 people: Mr. and Mrs. Trapper, Mandie, Jason, and Riley. Mr. Trapper wasn't as big as Johnny's dad, so he wouldn't be as good of an anchor, but they still had extra manpower. Riley could usually be seen alongside Johnny all the time, as they loved each other's company, but today she was his arch nemesis. Looks were exchanged between all of the warriors as Johnny's puppy Max ran back and forth in the mud barking at either side, not knowing what was happening.

Finally, the starting firecracker's fuse ended. As soon as the pop was heard, the rope tightened to an extreme. The cords of the rope were audibly rearranging themselves according to the weight being put on either end. The ribbon in the middle of the rope moved to and fro over the muddy ground as it fluttered in the breeze. Johnny was pulling with all the might his small muscles could. He felt like his training with his mom's two-pound weights that he had been doing the day before really payed off. He heard his dad's feet scratching against the ground and his mom and sister pulling behind him.

His feet started slipping towards the puddle. Impossible! He had put all his effort into winning this year! But wait! He saw that people were readjusting their grip. Even he was guilty of taking such brief moments of respite from the constant burning of the rope. It turned into a game of endurance. He held his grip as tight as he could and yelled for his dad to move back so he could have more space away from the puddle. Slowly, his dad took steps backwards. He put all of his weight (plus a few cherry pies) into pulling what slack there as in the rope to their side. Soon, Johnny saw it. The perfect opening. Mr. Trapper's foot was angled uncomfortably, and he lifted it off the ground to readjust.

Johnny let out the loudest war cry he could possibly muster and pulled as hard as he could. His father joined in and gave the rope a large yank. Riley was pulled in, and soon Jason tripped over her and landed head first in the puddle. From there, it was cake Johnny turned with the rope still in hand and ran away from the puddle. The rest of his family joined him. They soon heard the satisfying splash of their enemies falling into the murky pool. The victory was celebrated with watermelon, hot dogs, and lemonade. Johnny would remember this day forever.

...

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Crazy Cuckoos.

Today is Cuckoo Warning Day! Today is another summer related day (go figure, right?). It is said by a more than likely small number of people that if you were to hear the cuckoo crow (or whatever cuckoos do), then your summer will be a wet one. I find it odd that birds are always the ones that know more about the weather and the future. Maybe it's because they are higher up and are closer to the weather AND can see further. Either way, a cuckoo's song means rain. Now, usually this would be considered a "bad" thing, but I actually like the rain. However, since I realize I am in the minority on that debate, I will give advice on how to not hear the cuckoo caw.

Avoidance Maneuver: Don't go where cuckoos are. (South of South America/North of North America)

Alternative Maneuver: Wear earplugs all summer long.

Those are your two options.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Notes and Tips

Today is National Memo Day! Today is a day to know the importance of making, checking, and even sending those short little messages that tell you everything you need to know that day. So spend today with a pad of Post-Its on hand and write as many memos as you want. Go ahead. Jot until your hearts content. Send memos to other people in your workplace or leave notes on the fridge for your family. Write a memo on your hand if you're in junior high or on the side of your notes/doodles if you are in senior high. Even your computer has a memo program! Thats right! Huh? No, it's actually completely separate from your normal text editing program. Yes! There is a text editor devoted solely to memo making! I know! I don't know why they didn't just add it in to another one. Well, you should take it up with them, I don't represent their company. Look, just write it down somewhere so you remember, I have another holiday to talk about.

Today is also National Waitresses/Waiters Day! Now I don't know about you, but the waiting staff pretty much makes or breaks the meal when I'm out eating with my friends and/or family. I can safely say I've had one or two rude ones in my time, but over all my experiences with them have been good and even fun sometimes. Honestly, the kind of service you get directly reflects how you treat them, so if you are rude, don't expect them to be running back to you every time your drink is half gone. You SHOULD be nice to them every day, but if you aren't, make an exception for today. Be kind and for goodness sake, don't complicate things with crazy orders that don't make sense. It might be nice if you told them what today was and had fun mini-conversations with them every time they came around. The wait staff has the funniest stories about other customers and experiences they've had. So talk to 'em! And leave a larger than necessary tip! Leave a memo telling them how cool they are, too. That'd be nice.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Easy As ABC

Today is Kindergarten Day! A day to remember what your very first day at school was like or reminisce about those days when you were "graded" on how well you could color a cat (I got in trouble for coloring it with my gray pencil). It can also be a day to appreciate friends that you have had since that young age. Today was made because Friedrich Froebel, the creator of the very first kindergarten, was born today in the late 1700's. Kindergarten is a German word that translates into "Children's Daycare Center". Kindergarten used to be a half-day (I remember that better than most things) but now it is a whole day. This makes me happy I was in kindergarten back in the day. Not that a full day of coloring, napping, and learning one letter per week would be stressful...


Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

A nose by any other name...

... would still smell.

Today is Fragrance Day! It's fairly obviously dedicated to the more fragrant things such as flowers, fresh baked sweets, and perfume. Ladies will probably be better at this holiday, so to them I say: Select your favourite perfume/soap/shampoo/over-all scent and wear it proudly today. This next talk is between me and my fellow man, so if you are a lady, feel free to stop reading here.

Okay, guys, I don't know what it is about us, but let's face it: We stink sometimes often a lot of the time and simply don't realize it. Today is a day to not do that. Take a shower, shampoo your hair and repeat the lather like it says to on the bottle. You might even go crazy and condition. It never hurt anybody. Now see that oddly shaped, smooth rock on the side of the wall? Yeah, the one with the carving in it? Yeah that's actually soap and not a decorative statue. You're gonna take that and and put it everywhere on you. Now when you're done with the shower, dry off and put some deodorant on. WHOA STOP RIGHT THERE! I know you started reaching for that body spray. No, use REAL deodorant. The kind that stops smells instead of hoping that a cloud of AXE Phoenix will just cover up anything that happens to your shirt today. I'm talking to you, 8th graders. Feel free to spray a little on, but don't overpower anybody. It helps to not use AXE, too. I'm beginning to think that AXE might mean "Ouch! My nose. Where is the gas leak?" In some ancient language. Their stick deodorant is fine though.

Well, that's about all I can do for ya. Oh don't forget to put clean clothes on. I almost wasn't going to mention clothes since today is Fragrance Day and not Fashionista Day. However, it just occurred to me how comfortable we are with wearing the same clothes for several days. Do not do that. Wear something clean. If you don't have anything clean, then go buy new clothes. And find a local laundromat. Soon. Buy some minty gum, too. Because as it turns out, girls don't like breakfast burrito breath. Who would have thought, right?

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

P.S. Mango is possibly one of the best smells in my opinion.

To and From

Today is Card Reading Day! It's a day to... well... read cards. I happen to have a box of old cards that are from years ago, dating from early birthdays to my high school graduation. I'll be going through that little bit of nostalgia today in order to celebrate this holiday. There are more ways to celebrate, however. You might send some new cards out, making it easier for others to celebrate. You may want to go back through your week old valentine's day cards to see which ones hint at someone flirting with you and then try asking that person out. I only say that because today is a perfect week after the day, and it seemed almost too coincidental. The last way I can think of to celebrate this day would be to take it very literally and read every card that you see. That is obviously a dangerous way to celebrate. Just try to stay away from Hallmark stores, because if you look in and see all those cards, you'll be there for a while.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Hug it Out

National Hugging Day is upon us and with it come many ways to celebrate. The simplest way would be to hug your friends and acquaintances instead of shaking their hand, and generally hug more than you usually would. It's not like you should have to go out of your way to find the time to hug someone. If you wanted to take the holiday a little further, you could perhaps visit a nursing home and hug some people there to brighten their day. If you were so bold as to take the holiday very far, you could risk the public areas such as parks, malls, and (for only the very bold) swimming pools, and announce the holiday asking others to participate. Just don't be a creep about it. Check out these guys for an example: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr3x_RRJdd4&ob=av3el

Other than that, have a great day! Virtual hugs for everyone!

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle