I Ramble In This Post

Today is Chaos Never Dies Day! Today is a day to recognize the fact that there will always be some small amount of chaos in your life. It sounds depressing, but believe me: it isn't. Here, let me try to explain.

Chaos is, by definition according to my dictionary, Disorder and Confusion. Now, both or those words have a fairly obvious negative connotation to them, but disorder actually means "a state of confusion". That makes Disorder somewhat of a subsection of Confusion's whole business. So let's just focus on why I'm trying to tell you that Confusion is good. Well... not 'good'... but it isn't inherently bad.

Confusion means "A lack of understanding". Now we're getting somewhere. Instead of defining Confusion by any other word that has negative connotation, we are defining it by it's lack of a word with good connotation: Understanding, which means (most pertinently) 'the power of abstract thought'.

"WHOA, Kyle. I thought Chaos was abstract thoughts and stuff like that!"

Well, you are both right and wrong. Chaos deals with abstract thoughts, but only in the way that a baby deals with it's own diaper. See, Understanding is the power of abstract thought, meaning that it is used to harness the potential of the thoughts by putting them into patterns that can be easily remembered and later turned into ideas. That way your brain doesn't have to find it's way down memory lane twice. You made a map! Chaos, being the lack of understanding, can have all the thoughts it wants, but even if thoughts correlate, a map may never be made between the two, thus making it harder to see how they ever related.

It's almost like how you may tie a string around your finger to remember to go grocery shopping. How many things does grocery shopping have in common with tying a string to your finger? Close to none. But you see that string and it reminds you that you had something to do. Instantly your brain goes through the "Things I Have To Do" File Cabinet it has until it remembers: "Grocery Shopping". Congratulations! You have re-travelled the road you subconsciously made when you connected those thoughts in the first place. In fact, thats such a common visual stimulus, that when I see a string on someone's finger, one of the first things I think is "They must be trying to remember something". Not all abstract bridges need stimuli, though. In fact, most of my own don't.

Now that I've said ALL that, here is why chaos isn't bad: It's needed to make anything interesting. If we had only Understanding, then there would be little need for studying or exploring. Chaos, in manageable amounts, is what pushes humans forward. It causes new ideas to be had due to the fact that everyone connects the abstract thoughts differently. It makes us want to learn more and gain more understanding. However, the more we discover, the more questions there are about these new, as of yet unconnected abstract thoughts created by the new discovery. That creates an endless amount of things to discover, which makes life worth exploring! Chaos and Understanding aren't at opposite ends of any spectrum, instead it's more of a ratio of what is and isn't understood. The reason that Chaos is usually shed in such a scary light is because we can quantify how much we understand, but we will never be able to measure what we don't. I personally, find that pretty exciting, though. It would be boring if we knew how much there was left to know. Would we even want to?

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

All Around The Mulberry Bush

Today is Pop Goes the Weasel Day! This song was quite and is still fairly popular for little kids to sing. It started a long time ago in the mid 1800's as a dance. I can only hope that it wasn't the same kind of dance that children now "dance" to it's tune, as that would be quite embarrassing to think. I say "dance" in quotations for the children because it's really less like they are dancing in a ring or circle, and more like they are putting all their might and weight into forming some kind of amorphous, chin-seeking blob that spins. However, feel free to spend the day humming this song to or around others or surprising them like a real life Jack-in-the-box. (Psst! That's the tune that the Jack-in-the-box plays)

(That's a weasel)

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Mobius Logic

Today is My Bucket's Got A Hole In It Day! In case you are unaware of the song that today is based off of, follow this link to give it a quick listen. I'll wait for you to get back.

...

Done? Okay.

As you can tell, this is one of those songs made to annoy the listener, and staying true to the style, it can very easily be looped. This is even worse than "I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves" because THIS song has a problem that could very easily be solved. Unfortunately for the problem, two people who can't solve a problem if their buckets depended on it are trying to do the solving. This song was made in germany, though, and if there's anything I know about german children's stories its that they portray stupid or haughty children getting into stupidly painful (or in this case painfully stupid) predicaments or deaths. So I suppose, in a way, it could be seen as a warning to not be so incredibly dumb as to not see that you are making the problem an endless loop of anti-progress.

You can celebrate today one of two ways.
1) DON'T make your problems worse by being so unknowledgeable that you just get caught in an endless cycle of 'square-ones'. Eventually you won't even know the original problem. (Wait... were we cutting hay or sharpening a knife? Why is this rock so dry and why do I care?)
2) You can totally do that.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Landlubber

Today is Shrimp Scampi Day! I have to say, I've always been a little confused as to what this dish entailed. I know there is definitely shrimp in it, but I've seen it with noodles, in a sandwich, or even by itself. So however YOU make shrimp scampi, go ahead and do that... I guess. I gotta be perfectly honest here: I have never had shrimp anything. Or really any kind of seafood aside from the fish & chips I had in Ireland/England/Wales. I can only assume that, judging by the places I ate them, it wasn't any particularly rare fish that I was eating. Shrimp, though: never had it. Or sushi. Or crab. Or lobster. Or whale. Or dolphin. Or tuna. You name a sea-dwelling animal, and I probably haven't had it. Maybe that will change today? I don't know. Where does one procure some shrimp scampi? Can I just make it myself? This looks like a job for... ME! To go ask my mom. She'd probably know.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Swaddled Swine

Today is National Pigs in a Blanket Day! As an American, I love food. I am also a man, which means that a specific type of food I enjoy would be meat. As a southerner, I also am a fan of home-cooking and finger-food. These assumptions are all correct under common stereotypes, and may not be truthful to all Southern Northern American Man (or SNAM (Which is "Mans" backwards (Which may or not mean anything))).


All that to say that Pigs in a Blanket are one of man's best inventions since the sandwich. I say that because, if done correctly, it is basically like a tubular sandwich. Not "tubular" in the sense that it is as unto a gnarly wave to surf upon. No, I refer to it's shape. A cylinder. It's like a small, cylindrical, sandwich. It's Pig+Cheese+Bread. That's a sandwich. you may want to put lettuce or tomato or even both at once in your Swaddled Swine, but that's what we southerner's call "Fixing something that ain't broke." or "Overcomplicatin' it" or "Ruining the Pig's in a Blanket."


So keep it simple and enjoy one of the best appetizers/side dishes/party snack/Hors d'oeuvres in existence.


Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

All In

Today is Go For Broke Day! Today is a day to put everything you have into doing something that might earn you a very nice prize or reward. I hear this phrase used a lot in poker games or movies about poker games, but every once in a while people use it for random situations. However, in my opinion, it doesn't make much sense. Maybe I'm missing out on something but shouldn't it be something like "Go for it" or "Risk it all". Oh wait those phrases already exist. Still, "Go for Broke" makes it sound like you are going for the end result of being broke. I was under the impression that was not a desirable outcome in any life circumstance. Oh well, enough of that. Today, if there is something that you've been wanting to do, but thought of it as "too risky," it's time to put all your chips in and hold your poker face. Who knows? You could finally get that job/girlfriend/verdict you've been after for a while.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Taking Control

Today is I Am In Control Day! It is a day to gain some control back in your life that you may have lost over time. It's easy to feel like you've lost control, especially when things seem to be moving to fast for us to keep up with. Actually... come to think of it, I think we may only say something is "out of control" when we can't or won't own up to our own responsibility in the situation. I've NEVER heard someone say "This is out of control because of me". I most definitely HAVE heard people say "I've got this under control". That's most likely because once something becomes chaotic, we don't want any of the blame for it nor the responsibility for bringing it back to a state of calm. We will, however, take all the credit for something done right without a second thought.

That was a bit of a tangent. Today is a day to get your junk together and start being in control. It's like the scene in an action movie with thousands of bad guys charging towards the hero/heroine, who is frightened by the insurmountable army of zombies/nazis/monsters/aliens. The love interest will say something that causes the hero/heroine to have a flashback to something that a family member/friend once told him/her. When the flashback is over, the hero/heroine will say something witty to the love interest making her/him swoon/say something funny. The hero/heroine then stands up, draws his/her sword/gun and gets back on his/her horse/car/bike/spaceship and charges towards a slow-mo/slideshow fight to the tune of loud techno/operatic orchestra/We Aren't Gonna Take It by Twisted Sister. Roll Credits.

Thanks for reading!

~Kyle

Flowers in the sidewalk

Today is Festival of Life in the Cracks Day! This holiday was quite difficult to find any solid information on, but I think I now have a good idea of what it means. I'm fairly sure that anyone who has ever walked on a sidewalk has seen a crack from which a plant is growing or thousands of ants are traveling in and out of. Those would be examples of life in a crack. Now, I know that most of the things that live in those places are not usually on the top of our celebrating list. After all,  cracks, crevasses, and holes are where the creepy crawlers live. No person in their right mind would put their hand under a shady rock in the desert, and they definitely wouldn't celebrate the scorpion that they find. But, today is their day of celebration. That doesn't mean you have to go out of your way to have a one-on-one talk with that spider under your fridge that seems to just be sitting and waiting for its perfect chance to bite your toes, though.

I like to think of it as more of a celebration of the fact that life even can exist in such a place. They're small, dark, and cramped enough that I hardly even notice them most of the time. When I do think about it, though, it's pretty cool that a flower can find it's way through the tiniest little hole in the concrete. If anything, it stands out more than a flower in a field of flowers like it. I know that the flower in the cement is hardy simply because of where it has grown out of. Not to mention the bright color of it's petals in front of grey cement just makes it more noticeable.

So, if you really wanted to, you could make this a day to remember that a life in the cracks, although it can feel small, dark, and cramped, can be very rewarding after you get through that space. Much like the flower in the cement, it's easy to tell which people in life have been through some difficult situations or cracks in their life and come out better for it. Take today to also celebrate that they, like the flowers, are examples that it can be done.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle