Two Cents On Pennies

Today is Lucky Penny Day! Pennies aren't exactly worth what they used to be, as anybody who has ever been younger than anyone has been told constantly throughout their life. People have even talked about discontinuing them! That would be horrible! That's 1/4 of the world's good luck gone! The other 3/4 being 4-leaf clovers, rabbits feet, and horseshoes, of course. Sure, pennies don't exactly buy you candy anymore, but dimes haven't gotten me a soda lately either! So there! And what's up with arcade games being a whole dollar for one play? ...This is off-topic.

Lucky pennies are found in one place and in on manner. The ground and face-up. No, a penny with your birth year on it is not lucky just on that merit. Keepsake for a kitschy family project? Sure, but not lucky. No, a penny you find in a treasure chest isn't lucky. It's currency. By the way, your treasure hunts sound kinda weak if that's what you're pulling out of the sea. ONLY a penny found face-up on the ground is a "Lucky Penny".

You see, when a penny has charged it's luck up to a point where it feels sufficiently lucky, it jumps out of it's home in our pockets and purses in order to find it's own fortune. It lands on the ground face-up to signify to the next observant person that it is, in fact, lucky. Now, there are several ways to tell HOW lucky it is.

The first rule is: The shinier, the better. Why? Because that means it has so far been lucky enough to not run into any major troubles. with this rule comes the fact that you may just find a very young shiny penny. Those are mostly good for one lucky thing, as they were impetuous in their youth and thought themselves ready before they truly were. Hold onto them to see what small good thing happens, but don't expect too much from them, as they are a bit foolhardy. However, old shiny pennies are immensely lucky. Having obviously charged their luck for years in some sating lined wallet, they know exactly what they're doing. The danger comes when you find a scratched, worn, rusted, old penny face-up. It dares you to pick it up and accept it's challenge. Oh, sure. It's old. It's lucky. But it likes the risky road. It will make sure you DESERVE it's luck. Some of the scratches on it look almost as inhuman as Lincoln's visage on it's face. The ruins of the memorial on the back look almost apocalyptic. Sometimes, it is hard to tell whether you picked up a penny or a blackened copper disc. But what fun is luck if it falls into your lap? No, it's better to earn it. To have it thrown at you at high velocity along with a little bit of trial and a dash of fear just to see if you can handle the power of the penny! ... ...

... That got out of hand fast and I apologize.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle

Your New Year and You

Well, it's a new-fangled year again, and people everywhere are making resolutions that are more than likely vague and easily "loopholeable". I'm not saying that I am in any way immune to this pattern, but like everyone else, I am also saying "This year will be different!" You see, a few years ago I came across a handy list of holidays. There was at least one holiday listed for every day of the year, and I began simply using it as a conversation starter in such ways as "Did you know today was (insert obscure, question provoking holiday here) day? How do you even celebrate that?" However, after a year of what I can only describe as a down with about two ups, I've decided to make this year a little more exciting.

It took a while for me to find out how, but then it came to me. The list of holidays. I will celebrate every holiday on that list to the best of my ability. Luckily, after I post this post, I will be accountable. If I stop, I lose. However, some holidays are obviously out of my budget or past my ability to fully celebrate, so I may have to come up with my own way to celebrate them, but they WILL be celebrated. What better way to add a little uniqueness and excitement to a possibly boring day? ... Well there is probably plenty better, but this is what I'm doing.

I'v already celebrated one of today's holidays: First Foot Day. At first I thought I'd just find my first footprint and do some kind of artsy-fart activity with it, but then I found out the TRUE meaning of First Foot Day. In summary, during the viking days of old, Scotland had a tradition where a dark haired male being the first to step into your house on new years day was good luck, but a light-haired male or a woman was not. The man would bring coal and salt to wish warmth and flavour for the new year. Having walked into my house at about 1:45 a.m. last night after getting back from a new year's party, I have already celebrated, and luckily, I have darkish hair right now. I DID forget the coal and salt, but I'll just put extra salt on everything I eat today that merits having salt on it.

The OTHER holiday today is "Z Day". Now, I looked this one up, and supposedly it is a day when a class could celebrate by allowing the children with names that begin with "Z" be the first in line for everything, as they never are or will be when it comes to alphabetical order. This is not to be confused with "Zeitgeist Day", which is on March 13th, or the dreaded "Zombie Day" [Date unknown]. However I am out of school, and to my knowledge know only one person who has a "Z" name. They will be the FIRST person I tell "Happy New Years" to, though. As that's all I can really think to do, as I will most likely not see them today.

Now it seems I have gotten off easy for today, but rest assured, it will get more intense. It's always good to have an "ease-in" to such a large commitment, after all. I wouldn't want to rush what could be a beautiful thing.

Thanks for reading!
~Kyle